Its a Casino you dumb bitch
Fuck Your Luck
Where your luck doesn’t matter—and neither do you.
Dynamis | Halicarnassus | Goblet | Ward 14 | Plot 13
Friday | 10 PM EST - 2 AM EST
© TOS: This is just a game—don’t take it personally. You’re not forced to participate, so if you can’t handle how the gamble’s run, don’t whine. Leave if you can’t deal with it. Keep it respectful, or you’ll be banned from the venue. Enjoy it or get lost.
Games
GO ON, CLICK IT — MAYBE SOMETHING WILL FINALLY MAKE SENSE.READ THE RULES, UNLESS IGNORANCE IS YOUR THING.
Black Jack
POKER
Roulette
Baccarat
ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS
Chocobo Races
Bingo
“BLACK JACK”
Min Bet: 100k gilMax Bet: 1mil (Non-VIP) | Nightly VIP 3mil | Lifetime VIP 6milBank Limit: 10mil (Non-VIP). Nightly 30 mil | Lifetime 60milGoal: Get closer to 21 than the dealer without busting.Dealer: Stands on hard 17, hits on soft 17.How to Play: Start with 2 cards. Hit, stand, double down, or split.Payouts: Win = 1x bet | Blackjack = 1.5x bet | Natural Blackjack = 2x bet | Push =
“you get whatever the fuck i have”
Min 100k - Max 1mil
Entry Fee: 1 million gil for 10 tickets. Pay up or stay out.Tickets & Drawing: Buy as many as you want. Every round, 10 tickets get drawn.Winning Number: A random number is picked out of 200. Hit it or don’t cry.Prize: Winner takes 80% of the pot.
"rock,paper,scissiors"
Min 100k - Max 500k
Choose your move:
✊ Rock (closed fist)
✋ Paper (open hand)
✌️ Scissors (two fingers out)Count to three and show your choice at the same time.Winning:
Rock crushes Scissors
Scissors cuts Paper
Paper covers RockTie? Play again.
Poker: Texas Hold’em — Dealer Game
1 mil buy in
A classic game of cards, chips, and bluffing. Play smart, bluff harder.Buy in with gil, get your chips, and grab a seat.Honest players only — the dealer’s watching.Texas Hold’em style — private cards, community cards, and bets.Bet, fold, or bluff your way to the top.Best hand or last player standing takes the pot — minus the house cut.Think you’ve got what it takes? Step up and prove it.
Chocobo Races
Min 100k - Max 1mil
The dealer calls the number you gotta roll to pass each lap.Roll equal or higher? You keep racing. Roll lower? You crash and burn.You’ve got 5 seconds to shout STOP or you keep running — no time for slowpokes.Everyone’s racing at once — don’t hold up the show.Bet between 100k and 1mil gil — crash and the house takes it all.Make it to the end? Get paid big, depending on how far you last.
Sip, Swallow, Suffer
Min 100k - Max 2mil
* Bet between 100k and 2mil gil — big risks, bigger rewards.
* Roll high and double your gil.
* Hit the jackpot roll and triple it.
* Roll low? Well... you suffer.
* One shot, no rerolls, no excuses.
* Think you’ve got the guts? Step up and prove it.
Bingo
tbd
coming soon
Baccarat
tbd
coming soon
roulette
tbd
coming soon
Drinks
ORDER ALL YOU WANT—IT WON’T HELP YOU FEEL LESS OF A FAILURE.
PRESS THE IMAGE — YES, YOU NEED HELP UNDERSTANDING YOUR DRINK.
50,000k gil - Buyout 4 mil
My Therapist Hates Me
You Still Text Your Ex?
You’re the Reason Plan B Exists
Basic Bitch Brew
You get whatever the fuck i give you!
(Bar Game)
Sip, Swallow, Suffer
(Bar Game)
My Therapist Hates MeDark Rum · Coffee Liqueur · Absinthe · Cherry Syrup · Tonic
A chaotic swirl of bitter, sweet, and slightly toxic—sharp enough to sting, smooth enough to keep sipping. Finished with a scorched lime for that extra edge of regret.
You Still Text Your Ex?Tequila · Triple Sec · Passionfruit · Lime · Jalapeño
Sweet enough to hook you, hot enough to hurt you—this one’s a bad idea you’ll definitely repeat.
You’re the Reason Plan B ExistsVodka · Peach Schnapps · Cranberry · Lemon
Bright, bold, and way too easy to swallow—goes down smooth, but leaves you questioning every decision that got you here.
Basic Bitch BrewVanilla Vodka · Pumpkin Spice · Cold Brew · Cream
Sweet, frothy, and unapologetically predictable—like a seasonal fling you’ll brag about, then ghost by winter.
The staff
YES, PEOPLE WORK HERE—AND YOUR COMPLAINT JUST GOT FILED UNDER “LOL.”
Toxic Demon
Dealer and Owner
Ash Rosaire
General Manager / Poker Dealer / Accountant
Lilliana Reign
General Manager / Shout Runner
Draven Reign
General Manager / Security
Celeste Nightvale
Hostess
Salome Blythe
Gamba Dealer
Lecian Nahmoon
Gamba Dealer
Queen Vallana
Gamba Dealer
Shinja Vallana
Bartender
Packages for the broke and useless
Oh, yes we've got a VIP setup for those who think they're worth something.
NON VIP: MIN: 100K MAX: 1 MIL | MAX BANK 10 MIL
💀 FUCK YOUR LUCK CASINO — VIP PROGRAMS 💀━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
Because nothing says “I crave validation” like paying for it.
🩶 NIGHTLY VIP — 1 Million Gil
For those who think throwing gil makes them special. Spoiler: it doesn’t.Perks:
🥃 1 Free Drink — numb the regret early.
Max Bets:
🎰 Blackjack — 2M
🐦 Chocobo Races — 2M💀 Enjoy your hour of illusion — tomorrow, you’re back to broke.━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━🖤 LIFETIME DIAMOND VIP — 40 Million Gil
For the unhinged — the ones who don’t rent attention, they buy it forever.Perks:
🍸 Custom Drink Named After You — money can’t buy class, but it can buy another round.
🚪 Early Access (1 Hour Before Opening) — show up before the crowd, pretend you own the place.
💰 Extra 1k Free Poker Chips (Per VIsit) — we know you’ll lose them anyway.
Max Bets:
🎰 Blackjack — 3M
🐦 Chocobo Races — 3M💀 Deathroll Access (With Staff Only — up to 2M Max Bets) — for when losing your dignity isn’t enough.
🪩 Private Access Channel — where you and other high rollers flex in digital silence.
🧥 Exclusive Custom Tank Top — because nothing says elite like merch.💀 FUCK YOUR LUCK CASINO — VIP PROGRAMS 💀
Because nothing says “I crave validation” like paying for it.━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━